The Fathers in My Life


I wasn’t planning on writing a Father’s Day post today. I didn’t write one for Mother’s Day, and mostly it’s because I am so worn out come Sunday evening that I can barely function yet alone think clearly enough to write a blog post. We have afternoon church, and my church calling keeps me on my feet for two hours which I pay for come evening. However, I had a few thoughts today about the Fathers in my life so I wanted to jot them down.

My own father passed away when I was fifteen. It’s unfortunate (to say the least) that I lost my dad at such a young and critical age. People often speak of my dad and tell such wonderful things and have such happy memories. He really was an incredible man. Everyone who knew him loved him and wanted to be loved by him. He was funny and kind and strong and compassionate.

There is a song by Kenneth Cope that reminds me of my dad when I hear it. It’s called “Man in the Son”:

Papa loved granting favors
Digging deep for friends and strangers
He’d give his last dime
But never run short on love

He’d shine on more than one encounters
And now beyond his final hours
Remembering the man
Has the power to urge me on

He’d light up the day
He’d warm up the night
Whatever the day needed done
He’d carried the flame till he’d run out of fire
Climb in his plane and fly to the man in the sun

I married a man who is very unlike my dad. Whereas he was loud, boisterous, cheerful, outgoing, and jubilant, Adam is calm, careful, sensitive, and quiet. But like my dad, Adam is wonderful and loving, gentle and kind. He serves others willingly – almost nonstop, and he has a strong and unwavering testimony. Though very different, Adam and my dad would have gotten along very well. My dad certainly would have approved of my choice of husband.

The song “Push” by Sarah McLaughlin very, very, VERY accurately represents my husband Adam:

Every time I look at you the world just melts away
All my troubles all my fears dissolve in your affections
You’ve seen me at my weakest but you take me as I am
And when I fall you offer me a softer place to land

I get mad so easy but you give me room to breathe
No matter what I say or do ’cause you’re to good to fight about it
Even when I have to push just to see how far you’ll go
You wont stoop down to battle but you never turn to go

Your love is just the antidote when nothing else will cure me
There are times I cant decide when I cant tell up from down
You make me feel less crazy when otherwise I’d drown
But you pick me up and brush me off and tell me I’m okay
Sometimes that’s just what we need to get us through the day

You stay the course you hold the line you keep it all together
You’re the one true thing I know I can believe in
You’re all the things that I desire, you save me, you complete me
You’re the one true thing I know I can believe

I don’t have a song in mind that depicts my father-in-law…but I could make a long list of all his wonderful qualities. The one thing that stands out strongest to me is his generosity. There isn’t anything he wouldn’t do to help and serve his wife and children. He works hard, but having money is not important to him. I think what is important to him is how he can put that money to good use in the service of others. I remember shortly after Jack died, we were very tight on cash (emphasis on the VERY). Two of Adam’s siblings were getting married, and we didn’t think we would be able to attend and travel the long distances because we just couldn’t afford it. Without hesitation Adam’s dad said he would help us with the costs. He wanted us there and he wanted to help us. He has been generous to us in a like manner many other times as well. My mother-in-law is the same way. Like Adam and I, and like my mother and father, they are very well matched. What great examples we have both had to prepare us for our own married life.

While these men all share similar qualities, they are also very different. It is interesting how three men can be so different, but can also be equally wonderful.

I hope that all my brothers and brothers-in-law had a great father’s day. They are all amazing men and terrific fathers.

Sam, I hope you had an okay day, too. 🙂

One response »

  1. so sweet. thanks for sharing, the song for Adam I haven’t heard (no surprise there, I am very lacking in the music department of life), but it made me cry- hard. sooooo awesome. i am also one of those people who are thankful i knew your dad, he was such a good man!

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