On September 19th, we announced on Facebook that we are expecting baby number 4!
We posted this cute picture of Jane. Her shirt says “Jane, Effective March 2013, Promoted to Big Sister”
We told Megan much earlier…like as soon as we found out, and she was so excited. The day I told her, she was recovering from her tonsillectomy. She was tired and didn’t feel well, but you can tell she was pretty excited. Right before I told her the news, I told her that it was a family secret and she couldn’t even tell her cousins. That’s why she makes a comment about wanting to tell her cousins. Here is the video:
We are so excited to be welcoming a new baby into our family. My due date is March 21st so I am just over 20 weeks today (November 5th). I was pretty sick up until about 15 weeks. I am feeling a lot better these days, but unfortunately, my back just continues to get worse and worse. Hopefully it will hold out for another 19 weeks or so.
We had our big 20 week ultrasound last week, and as far as they could tell, our baby looks perfect and healthy. We’ve also decided that we are not going to find out the gender this time. We would be equally thrilled about a little boy or a little girl, so we think that not finding out until the actually delivery would be pretty incredible. Also, with the little mix-up with Jane where the doctor told us she was a boy at 19 weeks and we didn’t discover that she was actually a girl until I was 34 weeks, we learned a pretty powerful lesson about how very little the gender of the baby matters. I can’t even imagine what it will be like to find out only once the baby arrives if I am taking home a bundle of pink or a bundle of blue. People have said, “it’s a surprise no matter when you find out. At the ultrasound it’s just a surprise a little sooner.” I’ve been thinking about that, and I’ve come to find that logic is flawed. I mean, compare it to Christmas. Would you want to know what all your gifts were 5 months before Christmas arrived but then just wait until Christmas to open them? In terms of the “surprise” factor, I think it will be much more special to wait. I am not saying it is better or the way everyone should do it, especially since I haven’t even experienced it yet, but I will say that people who have suggested that it’s foolish to think it will be more of a surprise by waiting until baby arrives are wrong. As far as preparation goes, I have been prepared for a boy twice now, and a girl twice now so we are set either way. We are just over the moon thrilled to be welcoming a fourth child into our family.
Emotionally I have been a lot more calm this time around compared to my pregnancy with Jane. I think a lot of that has to do with being more distracted with Megan’s first grade transition and with my rambunctious-almost-two-year-old. Sometimes I am still terrified that this baby will be born sick like Jack. At our ultrasound, the doctor discovered that baby has a very long umbilical cord and so my mind has been racing with possible umbilical cord problems. I also have an anterior placenta which means that I am not feeling much movement at this point, so I am more anxious to feel baby moving around throughout the day. I know it is useless to worry, but fear of loss is something I think I will forever deal with. I am trying my best to feel at peace and let the plan unfold as it will, and for the most part it’s working. There is just this little voice in the back of my mind that constantly whispers “what if…”
So in the meantime, I am enjoying my two beautiful little girls who are growing up way too fast. Jane will be 2 next month!! And Megan will be 6 and a half! It is so fun to watch them grow and become the little people they will become, but it goes soooo fast! So as much as I am anxious for March 21st to arrive, I don’t want to take for granted this time I have with just my two girls. I just love being their mother!